June 2007

Reflections of a former first year graduate student

I can proudly say my first year of graduate school is done, and I think I have accomplished everything I need to, from courses to advisers. I must admit this year has been a bit of a roller coaster. I've gone through ups from getting a fellowship and joining a lab to the downs of being confused about my purpose overall at school and if I really have the right plan for myself. All in all, it seems I am having a normal experience, but I do feel WAY less sheltered than I did in college.

So in the last few weeks I have tried to re-invigorate me social activities around campus, while securing my spot in a lab! I joined the Cha-Ching softball team! Annie, Betty, Dilvan and Ted are on it, too, but I have not been able to make all the practices. The one day I did get a chance to play I ended up at second base, where I have never been before. I got on base, which was fun, but overall I think I only brought the team down! We have some real star players! Unfortunately I am not going to be able to play for the rest of the season as I am headed off to Providence, Rhode Island, to do some research with my former mentor, Ben Raphael, at Brown University.

I plan to be there for about two and a half weeks during July, and then again toward the end of August through September. I hope I don't miss the first year students that are arriving!! We have to do a welcome weekend activity with them, like we had last year with the scavenger hunt! That really helped me feel like things were coming together, and no one had forgotten us! It was also a great time to ask questions of the other students that are already in the program and get re- or newly acquainted with my fellow first years! I hope I can help out!

Last Friday we had a celebration for the end of our courses! David, Alex and I took our 214 final, and headed out for dinner with Annie! It was great! We went to this place called Mad&5th (where Ryan and I had dinner with his parents when they visited). It is really delicious. We toasted to our first year being over, and had delicious food! Unfortunately Noah could not make it since he had hurt his back (mysteriously) and had fainted at the doctor's office after getting a shot for the pain!!!! This picture is his new method for picking things up from the bottom shelf at the grocery store...efficient, right?

Also, the fancy MSOB coffee machine has been broken for quite some time! Ted warned me that I would have to give it up for awhile when they got it fixed, and the time finally came. Everyone claimed I was conspicuously absent from MSOB after it left, but in all fairness I really was just working harder at Clark! We did get the coffee machine back. I was writing it love notes on my whiteboard, and Mike wrote back on behalf of the machine when it got back! It's pretty funny! He has been a trooper! He's been walking around with a neckbrace for a while now in hope to avoid a serious surgery! I have my fingers crossed!

Yael also had her baby (Idan!!!) which is extremely exciting! She puts the rest of us to shame! While we are all complaining about work and school (or in my case the missing coffee machine-which we finally got back), she is doing it all and 9 months pregnant! It's really insane! I was pretty sure she was having contractions one day, and I drove her to her meeting that she was having. She kept saying it was her last day. Alain has been nice enough to let her use a scooter, but she says she feels stupid using it! I think that's just preposterous! I think she's completely entitled to using it! But then again I'm talking to someone who went through a natural birth and refuses to be resting at home! I hope I get to see her son before I leave!!!

Inspired by my recent shopping spree with Beth. Of course everything I got is lovely, but do I really need any of it? No! I have decided to set myself some sort of goal I have to achieve at which point I will allow myself to shop again. The goal: lose 10 lbs. I am allowed to buy anything that does not go directly on my body (accessories, shoes, purses, even jackets). Now this is quite challenging for me, and also presents a secondary issue, that once I lose weight, I will probably need new clothes anyways, so will it actually increase my spending in the end? In any case, Adele has turned me on to Billy Blank's Tae Bo, which is sort of like kickboxing except it uses these resistance bands, and kicks my butt!!! I'm about half way there at this point, so we'll see what develops! I think I will probably just be super addicted again! I need to go to SA (shopaholics anonymous). Beth does too!! So far I have only cheated once, and not even so badly since it was a pair of shorts (and it is getting quite hot)! However, the dress, I have no excuse for.

On Thursday I found out that Serafim had officially accepted me into the lab, which was super exciting! I heard through George, when he wrote me a message congratulating me, and from Marc who noticed that my status on the website had changed! I must confess I had been occasionally checking my status ever since I had approached Serafim. I had mentioned during a meeting that I was very happy in the lab with the work, of course the people are great, and that I would like to join the lab! He simply needed to talk to Russ about my strange situation with the funding between NSF and SGF. So I was pretty psyched about that!

I also had a chance to integrate myself into the lab that Friday when we had a end-of-year BBQ at my apartment (that's our lab meeting at the right and Marc getting thrown into the pool above). It was great fun! Many people came (even George before he headed off to the Bahamas-to ensure he could maintain his gold status as a frequent flyer)!

That evening Alex, Ryan and I went out with Genaro for some dancing and enjoyment at Nola's. It was very fun! We had a good time, and after we went over to Alex's house to watch a REALLY strange movie with some scary monsters that lead a girl around in a maze. It was pretty freaky. I got too tired and had to go home! The next night we went out with David for his pseudo-birthday party with Rahul! Ryan, Rahul and David had a round of drinks, which apparently were really good judging by the expression on their faces!

While I'm trying to get work done it's pretty hard to coordinate. Finals have left me fairly worn out, in preparation for Brown I feel like a lame duck, and I also have to get a poster set for the conference that we are hosting for the NLM next week. It's just been really hectic. I need everything to wind down! I also want to go see my family before I head out to Providence! I'm going to be missing everyone! I just hope I don't get super lonely!

This just seems to be the theme of the year. When you expect to have downtime, something else seems to pop up, and you are taken away from your research. Overall it's a great experience, but I have definitely been left questioning why I am putting myself through the stress of school and research, and if I am certain that this is what I want. In the end I always come back to the fact that I was so excited and sure of myself when I started the program, and that my setbacks and frustrations are just clouding what I really want. There is really no reason to stop! So I'm gonna steamroll through it all, and know I am really lucky to have love and support all along the way!